Amsterdam Guide

Oh, Amsterdam, the land of weed and prostitution, right? On this trip, I experienced new substances, was scarred by how far horniness will drive a man, and devoured fries. I will definitely be back to this land of bikes.

EAT:

Café George

OMG. Guys, guys, guys. There is the cutest little waiter working here. #snackandahalf He is so nice, brunette, and my future husband. If it’s nice out, have this mans wait on you outside at one of the white tables, or take a seat inside. The coffee was delicious and so were the eggs. The website states it as “The proverbial French-brassierie-in-New-York…But then in Amsterdam,” so I was meant to love it. Prices are reasonable, but I would pay dollas on dollas to see mon petit chou again.

G’s Brunchboat

I don’t know why this wasn’t a BB (basic bitch) semester abrobro (Guy Who Just Bought a Boat, SNL reference), but this is a must-do. The menu has Drake’s face on it. It’s so millennial friendly; I could scream. Only on the weekends, the boat includes an 1h35min tour of Amsterdam and serves brunch with two drinks. The price is a little steep (39.50 Euros) for a mediocre meal, but the R&B music and the views made it worth it.

Vleminckx Sausmeesters Homemade Fries

Best Belgian fries from Amsterdam. Did I go to Belgium to compare? No. Do I need to? Maybe. These fries were better than copulation. I got a size that wasn’t small, and I got three sauces. I was living life to the fullest and so should you.

SEE & DO:

A’Dam Lookout

If you go to this basic-bitch-semester-abroad-destination, BOOK IN ADVANCE. My friend told me that I could just walk in and then swing to my heart’s content, but you need a ticket with a time slot and then another ticket for the swing. For around 13 Euros, all of the aforementioned can be yours. Have a drink at the lounge, because they play house music–as is expected in The Netherlands. Also, make sure you get a pic from the back, and don’t rely on an amateur to snap a pic like mine (above). It’s so hard dealing with the public, sometimes.

Amsterdam I Am

Right in front of the Rijksmuseum is the real artwork (kidding, I love #culture). Seriously though, if you want a classic Amsterdam Instagram, you need to take a pic by, in, or on these letters. It’s also free, so you have no excuse not to. You are not above this tourist trap.

Moco Museum

We were lucky enough to catch “Banksy Laugh now” and “Roy Lichtenstein Lasting Influence” in March. The Banksy exhibition is showing until January 2019, so run my political art fans. There was a line when we went, but it didn’t take a long time to get inside. They offer a student discount because they’re cool like that, which made our admission fee only 10 Euros. It was honestly one of my favorite parts of my trip, but if you’re not an art person, then skip it.

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Their favourite @eltonjohn

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Van Gogh Museum

After learning about booking museum tickets ahead of time the hard way (Anne Frank House, I’m talking about you), we decided to buy tickets to the Van Gogh Museum. Tickets are only available online, so don’t just show up like a crazy person. An adult ticket is 18 euros, so you know that I’m not returning to this place. What I took away from this museum was that Van Gogh could write in French, was a super odd guy, definitely culturally appropriated Japanese art, and had a great funeral. Do with that what you will.


Featured Image: mochipanko.tumblr.com

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